An open letter to assorted take-aways, Corner shops, Milk-bars and any shops run by Asians or Wogs.

Dear assorted take-aways, Corner shops, Milk-bars and any shops run by Asians or Wogs.

There is a price on your heads, a price of 99cents each. I know its a bargin, and I know you will want to jack the price up to $3, but wait till the end of the fucking week.

What am I talking about?

Oh you fucking know. Every Monday, the start of a new week for specials, all you fuckers rush into Coles and Woolworths to buy up big on Coke. Currently Woolworths has 30 can cubes of Coke selling at $14. Works out to about 50 cents a can. Two of the stores I know have been sold out of Coke Zero since Tuesday, and the regular customers can't buy it because all the fucking Shops owners have come in and bought it all in the first two days.

Here is a tip from the Supermarket Ninja. If you like your head where it is, attached and on your neck, you will buy up big on your fucking Coke on the last day of the special. It will mean that regular folk can have a chance on getting some at the low price, rather than going to your crappy shop to buy it for 3 times the price. Its not like your pumping the profits into a community group or anything. You just want to see a 300% return on your investment.

That said, Community Groups can wait till Sunday aswell.

Also, fucking Olive Oil. If your a fucking wog that has a NEED to buy 20 cans of 5ltr Olive oil, then you too can wait till the last day of the special. Besides, why do you have a need for that much oil anyway? Do you fucking drink the stuff? Here is another Ninja tip. FIBER.

Now if you have a need to bulk buy shit on the first day of a special, there better be a fucking good reason, because there is a price on your heads and I plan on collecting.